The first Myth is that you need to be trained and educated on Parenting.

Quote on Parenting.
Parenting Quote.

Parenting is instinctive and no body needs training or to be educated.

One picks it up as one becomes a parent.

I recall a Seminar was invited to deliver a Lecture on Parenting.

Knowing my views I tried to refuse.

But on their insistence, I attended it.

I requested them to speak towards the end.

Speakers after speakers stressed on Parental Stress,Adjustment,Consistency, setting examples, carrot and stick, Lifestyle adjustment etc.

I was the last to speak.

‘ All of you have listened to exposition on Parenting.

Animals do Parenting, take care of their children, those of you who are present here have been brought up by parents,most of them not educated, definitely have not attended courses on Parenting.

I see that all of you to have grown up to be normal Adults’

That’s my message and sat down.

That’s my view even now.

The first myth is that some parents say: why would I do things differently? I turned out just fine, so I guess my parents got it right and now I’m duplicating their system!

To those parents I’d like to say: what makes you feel so sure that this system will work for your child as well? Is your child a perfect copy of you? And wouldn’t it be nice to think of a system first and then decide what system to use instead of picking up the pieces afterwards, when it’s too late?”

True.

Be yourself, that’s enough.

Don’t try out to be what you are not.

“The second myth that I hear very often, from both parents and experts on this topic, is that you should let your child know who’s the boss, by punishing, blackmailing or rewarding your child! There are many, many books written why I think you should never even consider doing things like this. But the main reasons are that punishing and blackmailing are based on fear, otherwise, your child would not listen to you. Rewarding is based on dependency, otherwise your child would not be willing to do the things you want. This way, your child will never become an independent individual. In all cases, you are on the receiving end, as you always get what you want!”

There is no question of being a Boss with your child, it is ridiculous.

Act instinctively and do what you think is right for the child.

The third myth is that one should be consistent! It is a myth that I also hear often.

When I first became a parent, I also tried to be consistent, but I failed time after time. I simply could not keep it up. So in the end, I gave up completely. When I heard that being consistent is impossible, I felt so relieved! To put it even stronger: if you want to be consistent, you will need to suppress your own feelings and at times, will need to lie to your own child. This way, your child will never learn to take other people’s feelings into consideration. So now you know, this is a myth, and nothing else but a myth.”

Humans by Nature are and never can be consistent.

If you try you will become artificial and your child can detect it and avoid you!

Reference:

http://www.enannysource.com/blog/index.php/2013/05/29/expert-insights-with-laura-fobler-coach-and-author-of-the-parenting-struggle/

 

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