Those who are after crass materialism, justifying the craze for Money and creature comforts, with the excuse of citing ‘cost of living,those who say this
themselves are not convinced of this), must watch these Videos of Babies being left to the care of the Maids.
I do not wan to add any comment as the videos are enough and for more information on these and parenting, check my posts on parenting/lifestyle.
” A baby-sitter was caught on the CCTV torturing an 11-month-old boy in Narhe on May 7.
The Dattawadi police on Tuesday arrested Baby Laxman Patole, 42, a resident of Ramtekdi in Hadapsar, following a complaint lodged by the parents, who work in a BPO.
“My wife and I have to work night shifts. So, to look after our son we hired Patole from a city-based agency about seven days before the incident,” the boy’s father told Times of India. Patole was clearly told about her working hours. “We also told her that our flat is under CCTV surveillance and that she should remain alert,” he said.
The parents, however, realized the baby was not happy with Patole. “He would cry aloud when we left for work. This made us suspicious, so we checked the CCTV footage. We were shocked. On the night of May 7, my son was crying as he could not sleep. Patole switched off the light and also pulled the curtains. She then slapped my son. When he cried loudly, she threw him on the bean bag and flung him holding his hands,” the father said.
Patole was not aware that the CCTV cameras had night-vision facility.
Happy because the post generated a lot of discussion with members speaking out with out inhibition.
Sad because it revealed to me the malaise that is eating our Society.
Though the views of the communities need not reflect the views of all the other Communities in general, this particular community views are taken as a model for others despite their bashing this Community.
During the course of the discussions I came across views, which I will sum up as it would be unethical to post them direct here.
1.All agree that there is this problem of leaving the elderly in Old Age Homes
.2.The elderly also prefer it.
3.This, from the trend and profiles I could gleam, seems to be from NRI .( parents of NRIs and the parents themselves)
4.It is my impression that there seems to be communication disconnect between the Parents and the Children.
5.Children do want to keep them at Home.
6.Sad was a comment the children is ‘an Insurance for parents’ posted by a Parent.
7.Equally appalling was a comment that “Parents are incorrigible and make the Life of Children Hell”
I have posted my views in the group discussion.
Then there was a question of Duty of Sons (No body spoke about daughters!)
The point is that where was this problem, say 40 years ago?
Agreed that we had differences at Homes with parents with us, we never thought that ‘they were living with us’ rather’ we were living in a Home’
Tiffs are always sorted out,
Then why so now?
1.People have gone after monetary values alone.
Parents want their sons to go abroad , especially the US for Higher Studies and Jobs.
When they get a Green Card, the parents feel that they own the world.
Forgetting that the values and the standard of Living shall make sure that they do not return.
If you have sent your child abroad you should be prepared for it.
Alternately, you should stay with them there.
If you a can not stay because you want to come to your Native place, then you have no other option but to stay here alone or in an Old Age Home.
You can not blame the children for it.
Not that you need not send your children abroad, but only that you should have the maturity to handle the consequences.
The practice of using the concept Moon as a part of Life goes to the Tamils.
There is no Poet who has not sung about Moon right from the Classical Age of the Sangam till the present day.
It is also the part of Indian life to show Moon and feed the child.
Usually a song is sung inviting The Moon to play with the child.
This has been such an expected custom that a special grammar has been created to accommodate this activity.
In PillaiThamizh, The Tamil of The child, various stages of the child’s growth has been explained and suitable songs were sung.
Those who know Tamil, enjoy this song, Thiuvoimozhi of Periyazhvar sung in praise of Lord Krishna asking Him to sleep while making Him sleep in a Cradle.
The celebration of the Moon is not restricted children.
Moon is used to express Love,Pangs of separation and even pathos.
I am proving some songs towards the close of the Post.
It is the practice, as the child grows up, to have the family sit around in the Pial( a reclining slab at the entrance of the House) have the food made into a Ball , place in the Palm of the family members.
This is/was widely practiced.
I used it to do this for my children till they were in the Ninth or tenth standard.
The taste and the camaraderie one feels as a Unit is incomparable.
Children eat more than what they usually consume.
Tamils have taken this a step further,
In ancient days, Homes had a special area built, normally in the first floor and the Kings used to build a Floor for this purpose , enjoy the Moon and take food.
This place is called the Courtyard of Moon.’Nila Mutram’.
There is also the practice of eating under the Moon with the family on the Full Moon Day of the Chaitra,Chiththitrai Month , The Full Moon Day of April.
Special festival is celebrated on this day and this is special in Madurai, Chitra Pournami
Such simple pleasures do not cost you nor do they harm children.
There are some customs being followed in Tamil Nadu.
They look strange, superstitious and totally irrational.
So are some problems in Life.
For instance, Children, especially below the age of Four,when they can not articulate things.
The child would be Healthy in all respects.
But it would refuse to eat food.
You may try anything to make the child eat, but it would still refuse.
You consult a Doctor.
He tells you that he child is alright and it would take food on its own.
Some go even further and tell you to feed the child if it cries and, any way as an organism the child would seek food when it needs it!
The problem is that as a parent or a Grandparent you just can not await the child to demand foo or let it cry incessantly.
There are some practices to rectify this problem and these worked for my children and work for my grand children.
When you attempt to feed the child, some food would remain.
Take this and place it on the road where a Dog can eat.
Do not feed the child in front of others or in Public.
If you have to feed in a Milk Bottle, keep the Milk Bottle covered, ready-made covers are available .
To prevent the child waking up in the middle of the night crying, keep a New Broomstick underneath your cot.
Some times you may find the children crying for no reason, despite being fit.
In these circumstances, take two red chilliness,little Crystal Salt in your right Palm close your palms, let the child face The East , keep your close Palm in the other , rotate clockwise , anti clock wise, up and down( each thrice) in front of the child’s Face and leave the chilies and Salt on the road.
There is also this practice of throwing this mixture in Coal Embers at Home or in the Flames of a kerosene stove instead of throwing the mixture on the road.
Normally this mixture dropped in Fire or Embers should make you choke.
Some time it would not.
That, my mother used to say, that evil eye has been cast and been removed.
Another practice is to have the person or the child spit on this mixture after rotating and throwing ti away,Brahmin households do not follow this.
As soon as the child completes its first birthday the practice among Brahmins in Tamil Nadu is to tie a small piece of Acorus calamusor Vasambu in the hip around the waist of the child in a Black thread(Araignyan)
This, it is believed to prevent diseases and ward off evil-eye.
Yet another practice is place Camphor in a small plate, light, show it in front the child facing East or North, rotate this clockwise , anticlockwise ,up and down in front of the Face thrice and keeping it in front of the house, closing the door after placing the Aarti plate out.
I do this for my Grand children every day.
There is also the practice of applying a black dot on the Cheek of the child.
I have seen Rationality does not work always with children but these do, especially when it concerns their Health