Tag Archives: lifestyle

Marriage Nischayathaartha Selecting Girl Ritual Details Apsthamba Sutra Explains

Smritis,meaning those remembered,lays down rules to lead a pious, auspicious and happy life.

The Smritis are different from Sruthi,meaning ‘heard’,that is the Vedas.

For deciding any righteousness action,or for any action,in case of confusion,the words of Sruthi is final.

If there is a conflict of views between Srithi and Smriti on any issue,Sruthi is the final authority.

Sruthi is like the Fundamental Rights in the Constitution of India and Smriti is like the Directive Principles of State Policy.

At all times, fundamental rights prevail.

Smritis evolved over a period of time,with its base in Sruthi.

But it also incorporates practices not in contradiction to Vedas.

So, there are many Smritis.

Please read my article on Smritis.

For those who ollow,ApasthambaSutra,Apasthamba lays down rules of life in his Apasthamba Gruhya Sutra.

Here one would find, not only the rules to follow,but also suggestions on various important events in one’s life,like marriage,Naming ceremony.

I am providing from Apasthamba Gruhya Sutra portions relating to marriage on,

  1. Seasons,months to marry,
  2. Which months to a avoid,
  3. Marriage Nakshatras,
  4. The attributes of a bride,
  5. The process of choosing a bride,
  6. The process of conducting marriage,

12. All seasons are fit for marriage with the exception of the two months of the śiśira season, and of the last summer month.

13. All Nakṣatras which are stated to be pure, (are fit for marriage);

14. And all auspicious performances.

15. And one should learn from women what ceremonies (are required by custom).

16.Under the Invakās (Nakṣatra), (the wooers who go to the girl’s father) are sent out: such wooers are welcome.

Under the Maghās (Nakṣatra) cows are provided;

2. Under the Phalgunī (Nakṣatra) marriage is celebrated.

3. A daughter whom he wishes to be dear (to her husband), a father should give in marriage under the Niṣṭyā (Nakṣatra); thus she becomes dear (to her husband); she does not return (to her father’s) house: this is an observance based on a Brāhmaṇa.

4.The word Invakās means Mṛgaśiras; the word Niṣṭyā means Svāti.

5.At the wedding one cow;

6. In the house one cow:

7. With the (first cow) he should prepare an Argha reception for the bridegroom as for a guest,

8. With the other (the bridegroom [?] should do so) for a person whom he reveres.

9. These are the occasions for killing a cow: (the arrival of) a guest, (the Aṣṭakā sacrifice offered to) the Fathers, and marriage.

10. Let (the wooer) avoid in his wooing a girl that sleeps, or cries, or has left home.

11.And let him avoid one who has been given (to another), and who is guarded (by her relations), and one who looks wicked (?), or who is a most excellent one (?), or (who is like the fabulous deer) śarabha (?), a hunch-back, a girl of monstrous appearance, a bald-headed girl, a girl whose skin is like a frog’s (?), a girl who has gone over to another family (?), a girl given to sensual pleasures (?), or a herdess, or one who has too many friends, or who has a fine younger sister, or one whose age is too near to that of the bridegroom (?).

12.Girls who have the name of a Nakṣatra, or of a river, or of a tree, are objectionable.

13. And all girls in whose names the last letter but one is r or l, one should avoid in wooing.

14. If possible, he should place (the following) objects hidden before the girl, and should say to her, ‘Touch (one of these things).’

15. (The objects are), different kinds of seeds mixed together, loose earth from (the kind of sacrificial altar called) vedi, an earth-clod from a field, cow-dung, and an earth-clod from a cemetery.

16. If she touches one of the former (objects, this portends) prosperity as characterized (by the nature of what she has touched).

17. The last is regarded as objectionable.

18. Let him marry a girl of good family and character, with auspicious characteristics, and of good health.

19. Good family, a good character, auspicious characteristics, learning, and good health: these are the accomplishments of a bridegroom.

20. A wife who is pleasing to his mind and his eyes, will bring happiness to him; let him pay no attention to the other things: such is the opinion of some.

Praśna 2, Section 4

1. Let him send out as his wooers friends who have assembled, who are versed in the Mantras.

2. He should recite over them the first two verses (Mantrap. I, 1, 1. 2).

3. When he himself has seen (the bride), let him murmur the third (verse; M. I, 1, 3).

4. With the fourth (M. I, 1, 4) let him behold her.

5. Let him seize with his thumb and fourth finger a Darbha blade, and let him wipe (therewith) the interstice between her eye-brows with the next Yajus (M. I, 1, 5), and let him throw it away towards the west.

6. If an omen occurs (such as the bride’s or her relations’ weeping), let him murmur the next (verse; M. I, 1, 6).

7. With the next (verse; M. I, 1, 7) let him send an even number of persons who have assembled there, and who are versed in the Mantras, to fetch water.

8. With the next Yajus (M. I, 1, 8) he places a round piece of Darbha net-work on her head; on that, with the next (verse; M. I, 1, 9) he places a right yoke-hole; on this hole he lays with the next (verse; M. I, 1, 10), a piece of gold, and washes her with the next five verses (M. I, 2, 1-5), (so that the water runs over that gold and through the yoke-hole); with the next (verse; M. I, 2, 6) he causes her to dress in a fresh garment, and with the next (M. I, 2, 7) he girds her with a rope.

9. Then he takes hold of her with the next (verse; M. I, 2, 8) by her right hand, leads her to the fire, spreads a mat, west of the fire, so that the points of the blades in it are directed towards the north, and on this mat they both sit down, the bridegroom to the north.

10. After the ceremonies have been performed from the putting of wood on the fire down to the Ājyabhāga oblations, he recites over her the first two (verses of the third Anuvāka).

11. Then he should take with his right hand, palm down, her right hand which she holds palm up.

12. If he wishes that only daughters may be born to him, he should seize only the fingers (without the thumb);

13. If he wishes that only sons may be born to him, the thumb.

14. He takes (her hand) so as just to touch her thumb and the little hairs (on her hand),

15. With the four verses, ‘I take thy hand’ (Mantrap. I, 3, 3-6).

16. He then makes her step forward with her right foot, to the north of the fire, in an easterly or northerly direction, with (the formula), ‘One step for sap’ (M. I, 3, 7).

17. At her seventh step he murmurs, ‘Be a friend’ (M. I, 3, 14).

Having before the sacrifice gone round the fire, so that their right sides are turned towards it,

2. They sit down in their former position, and while she takes hold of him, he offers the oblations (indicated by the) next (Mantras), with (the Mantras), ‘To Soma, the acquirer of a wife, Svāhā!’ (M. I, 4, I-16), one oblation with each Mantra.

3. He then causes her, to the north of the fire, to tread with her right foot on a stone, with (the verse), ‘Tread’ (M. I, 5, 1).

4. Having ‘spread under’ Ājya into her joined hands, he pours roasted grain twice (into them), and sprinkles Ājya over it.

5. Some say that an uterine relation of hers pours the grain (into her hands).

6. He (?) sacrifices (that grain) with (the verse), ‘This wife’ (M. I, 5, 2).

7.Having gone round the fire, with the right side turned towards it, with the next three (verses; M. I, 5, 3-5) he makes her tread on the stone as above (M. I, 5, 6).

8. And the oblation (is performed) with the next (verse; M. I, 5, 7).

9. (Then follow) again the circumambulation (M. I, 5, 8-10), the injunction to tread on the stone. (I, 5, 11), and the oblation with the next (verse; I, 5, 12);

10. (Then) the circumambulation again (I, 5, 13-15).

11. He enters upon the performance of the Jaya and following oblations.

12. Having performed (the rites) down to the sprinkling (of water) round (the fire), and having untied the rope with the next two verses (I, 5, 16. 17), he should then make her depart (from her father’s house in a vehicle), or should have her taken away.

13. Having put that fire (with which the marriage rites have been performed, into a vessel), they carry it behind (the newly-married couple).

14. It should be kept constantly.

15. If it goes out, (a new fire) should be kindled by attrition,

16. Or it should be fetched from the house of a Śrotriya.

17. Besides, if (the fire) goes out, one of them, either the wife or the husband, should fast.

18. Or he may sacrifice with the next (verse; M. I, 5, 18), and not fast.

19. The next (verse; M. I, 6, 1) is for putting the chariot (on which the young couple is to depart), in position;

20. With the next two (verses; M. I, 6, 2. 3), he puts the two animals to the chariot;

21. First the right one.

22. When she mounts (the chariot), he recites over her the next (verses; M. I, 6, 4-7).

23. With the next (verse; M. I, 6, 8), he spreads out two threads in the wheel-tracks (in which the chariot is to go), a dark-blue one in the right (track), a red one in the left.

24. With the next (verses; M. I, 6, 9-11), he walks on these (threads).

25. And when they pass by bathing-places, posts, or cross-roads, let him murmur the next (verse; M. I, 6, 12).

The next (verse; M. I, 6, 13), he recites over a boat (with which they are going to cross a river).

2. And let the wife, when she is crossing, not see the crew.

3. When they have crossed, let him murmur the next (verse; M. I, 6, 14).

4. If they have to pass over a cemetery, or if any article (which they carry with them), or their chariot is damaged, the ceremonies from the putting of wood on the fire down to the Ājyabhāga oblations are performed, and while she takes hold of him, he offers the oblations (indicated by the) next (Mantras; M. I, 7, 1-7), then he enters upon the performance of the Jaya and following oblations, and performs (the rites) down to the sprinkling (of water) round (the fire).

5. If they pass by trees with milky sap or by other trees that serve as marks, by rivers or by deserts, he should murmur the next two (verses; M. I, 7, 8. 9), according to the characteristics in them (which refer to these different cases).

6. With the next (verse) he shows her the house(M. I, 7, 10).7. With the next two (verses; M. I, 7, 11. 12) he unyokes the two animals; the right one first.

8. Having, with the next (verse; M. I, 8, 1), spread out, in the centre of the house, a red bull’s skin with the neck to the east, with the hair up, he causes her to recite the next (verse; M. I, 8, 2), while he makes her enter the house, (which she does) with her right foot.

9. And she does not stand on the threshold.

10. In the north-east part of the house the ceremonies from the putting of wood on the fire down to the Ājyabhāga oblations are performed, and while she takes hold of him, he offers the oblations (indicated by the) next (Mantras; M. I, 8, 3-15); then he enters upon the performance of the Gaya and following oblations, and performs (the rites) down to the sprinkling (of water) round (the fire). Then they sit down with the next (verse; M. I, 9, 1) on the skin, the bridegroom to the north.

11. He then places with the next (verse; M. I, 9, 2), the son of a wife who has only sons and whose children are alive, in her lap, gives fruits to the (child) with the next Yajus (M. I, 9, 3), and murmurs the next ṭwo (verses; M. I, 9, 4-5). Then he (and his wife) observe silence until the stars appear.

12. When the stars have appeared, he goes out (of the house with her) in an easterly or northerly direction, and shows her the polar star and (the star) Arundhatī with the next two verses (M. I, 9, 6-7), according to the characteristics (contained in those verses).

He then makes her offer the sacrifice of a Sthālīpāka sacred to Agni.

2. The wife husks (the rice grains out of which this Sthālīpāka is prepared).

3. After he has cooked (the Sthālīpāka), and has sprinkled (Ājya) over it, and has taken it from the fire towards the east or the north, and has sprinkled (Ājya) over it while it stands (there near the fire), (the ceremonies) from the putting of wood on the fire down to the Ājyabhāga oblations (are performed), and while she takes hold of him, he sacrifices of that Sthālīpāka.

4. The ‘spreading under’ and the sprinkling over (of Ājya are done) once; two Avadānas (or cut-off portions are taken).

5. Agni is the deity (of the first oblation); the offering is made with the word Svāhā.

6. Or he may sacrifice after having picked out, once, a portion (of the sacrificial food with the Darvi spoon).

7. Agni Sviṣṭakṛt is the second (deity).

8. (At the Sviṣṭakṛt oblation) the ‘spreading under’ and taking an Avadāna are done once, the sprinkling over (of Ājya) twice.

9. The Avadāna for the first deity (is taken) out of the middle (of the Sthālīpāka);

10. It is offered over the centre (of the fire). 11. (The Avadāna) for the second (deity is taken) from the northern part (of the Sthālīpāka);

12. It is offered over the easterly part of the northerly part (of the fire).

13Having silently anointed (a part of) the Barhis (by dipping it) into the remains both (of the Sthālīpāka and the Ājya) in the way prescribed (in the Śrauta ritual) for the (part of the Barhis called) Prastara, he throws (that part of the Barhis) into the fire.

14.(The rule regarding) the second sprinkling (of water round the fire) is valid (here).

15. He gives (the remains of) that (sacrificial food) with butter to a Brāhmaṇa to eat—

16. Whom he reveres. To that (Brāhmaṇa) he makes the present of a bull.

17. In the same way, with the exception of the sacrificial gift, they should sacrifice a Sthālīpāka from then onwards, on the days of the new and full moon, after having fasted.

18. Some say that a vessel full (of grain) is the sacrificial gift.

19. From then onwards he should offer morning and evening with his hand these two oblations (to Agni and to Agni Sviṣṭakṛt) of (rice) grains or of barley.

Prasna 1, Section 1 to Prasna 4, Section 8.



Subrahmanya,Hindu God. Image

Towards The End Subrahmanya

I had the unpleasant task of visiting my elder brother , 86, who was hospitalised for a Fall.

Unpleasant because , to see one who had been vigorous, fiercely independent and forever dynamic bedridden depending on others for basic functions.

To see human beings dependant on others is pathetic.

And the blind trust one has to have on others on such situations.

One is proud, independant, does not bother others or bothers about others when one is healthy and/or young.

When one falls sick or advances in age when one can not even command his senses, pitiable.

People might have money, contacts.

Yet one needs people at these times.

One must also remember that those who assist, be it children or friends, that they have their commitments, offices/businesses to attend to, families to look after……

As one lies helplessly, awaiting others to come to help….

Humiliating and painful.

Yet you can do nothing.

If the disease is severe and chances of revival are remote, horrible!

One can not choose his time of Death.

What does one need towards the end of his life?


He should not lie sick,

He should not have self reproach and the

End should be swift and painless.

.நோயுற்று அடராமல் நொந்து மனம் வாடாமல் பாயிற் கிடவாமல் பாவியேன் காயத் தை ஓர் நொடிக்குள் நீக்கி என்னை ஒன் போருர் ஐயா நின் சீரடிக்கீழ் வைப்பாய் தெரிந்து’

‘சென்னை போரூர் பா மாலையில் தவத்திரு சிதம்பர சுவாமிகள் தி ருவாய் மலர்ந்து அருளியது.

Addressed to Lord Subrahmanya at Porur.

Let me be not struck by disease,

Nor do I suffer by Self reproach,

Ensure Lord Subrahmanya that You ensure I attain Your Feet swiftly, without pain.

-Chidambara Swamigal, Porur Paamaalai.

Asshada Practices Husband Wife No Sanction Hinduism

In a highly personalised Religion, sometimes misconceptions creep in.

Though Hinduism insists that one has to study the Vedas, the Scripture of Hindus, people often do not do so, confused as they are with the dictum that Guru should be obeyed.

The problem is that Guru is different from Acharya, Upadhyaya.

For Details read my article Guru Acharya Upadhyaya.

Guru is one who instinctively understands your spiritual needs and guides and their instructions will never run contrary to Vedas, Sruthi.

In such cases where Gurus instructions are at variance with Vedas, Veda should be followed.

On the other hand, Upadhyayas and Acharyas do not have as nuch the authority as the Guru.

As such their instructions, if they run counter to Vedas are to be ignored.

Over a period of years people have not studied Vedas nor many know about the Smritis.

Smriti is a code of conduct which is followed over a period of Time.

Even Smritis if they run contrary to Vedas, are to ignored.

For Vaidikas, Vedas are the Sole Authority.

Many of us follow what purohit says without bothering to check either Sruthi or Smriti.

Result is that many irrelevant practices not found in Vedas , Smritis are followed.

I have been writing on some of these practices which do more harm to Hinduism than Atheists.

I have received the following query on Ashada Maasa, Adi in Tamil.

‘Dear Sir Good Morning. I have been reading your Blog since long time and the information u have been sharing is really incredible. Today, I have a question where I am not getting any exact answers ..hope u can clarify it for me.
This is Regarding the AAshada Masam as I got newly married, the customs followed during this month was implied on me as well but the questions unanswered or partially answered.

1. Why do Mother-In Law and Daughter inlaw should not walk in the same main door or stay together.
2. Why Husband and wife should not stay together.
3. Incase if the girl gets conceived during the aashada maasam will there be a negative effect on the child or is there any negetive effect on the mother during delivery time or so.’

My answer.

All these points have no sanctions by Sruthi or Smriti and hence may be ignored.

These seem to have crept in as Mores/ practices in Communities.

There is also an effort to justify the separation of couples in Aashada, arguing that if the couple were to be together and if the woman conceives in Aashada, she would deliver in Summer .

This is effort to justify something which is not needed.

The premises for the practice is hypothetical.

And Hinduism does not intrude in to private affairs unnecessarily.

And wherever it needs to intervene in personal Life it comes out clearly with no ambiguities.

So one need not try to promote Hinduism by saying things which Hinduism does not.

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Mantra To Avoid Divorce Marital Disharmony

I receive quite a few mails regarding personal problems from the Readers ,seeking solution to their personal Issues and I suggest solutions both from the empirical point and from the Mantra aspect.

Most report that their problems are resolved.

I have noticed that the issues fall under these issues.
1.Seeking a child.
2.Financial difficuties.
3.Court problems.
4.Health Issues,physical and mental.
5.Delayed Marriages.
One important issue about which I have been receiving quite a lot of mails,to my regret, is marital incompatibility,strained relationships and divorce.
I am pained.
Before I proceed to provide Mantra to help prevent break up of marriages,Improve strained relationships, I would like to share a few thoughts derived out of experience , interacting with a lot people and by counseling people.

Family is the fundamental unit of society and human beings,gregarious by Nature,need others for their well being,physical,mental,emotional and spirititual.

I have come across people who declare that they do not any one for anything .

Least of all a marriage.

I have quite a few friends who are women( connotation would differ if I say girl friends),who declared about 30 years ago that they did not like marriage,wanted to be independant and concentrate on their carrers.

I have met them recently and meet them often.

Some of them are well known in Fine Arts,Communications and all of them are successful professionals in their chosen field.

None of them is worth less than Rupees one crore and palatial homes in prime localities in Bangalore with servants galore to take care of them.

Being close friends ,they  tell me that  they feel that they have lost out in life,despite their material success and were anguished that they have none to call their own nor any one in whom they can confide in.

They admitted that professional success and a family need not be in conflict with each other and wished they had a family and pursued their ambitions and managed both.

It is too late for them now.

The point is when two individuals come together there is bound to be conflicts for if there is no conflict ,it is no relationship.

The skill lies in managing the two and survive.

Life is a question of adaptation,management and survival.

If you think deep,you will know that we have been compromising throughout our Life right from childhood.

And it is the Law of Life.

Had we not,we would not have survived.

There is a mistaken impression that we compromise for others.

We compromise because we want to be happy.

Nothing wrong in this.

One marries because one wants to and one feels one would be happy if one marries.

No body marries for altruism.

But as in life’s choices every thing comes with a unique problem of its own and one has to manage.

Are there not conflicts in Fine Arts ,in other professions?

Do people not adjust and manage?

Then why shy away from marriage?

In my opinion it is the fear of responsibility one has to bear with marriage.Marriage is not mere physical.

It has emotional and spiritual side as well.

And companionship.

One needs company after one crosses 50,not merely for Sex.

Unfortunately ,one tends to equate marriage with Sex,thanks to western thoughts!

In India marriages are beyond physical and they are spiritual too.Lord Shiva carries Uma as a part of His body,Vishnu in His heart and Brahma in His tongue.

Shiva and Parvati and regarded as words and meaning,one has no relevance withiut the other.

My point is that one has to adapt in marriages.

No one has an ideal husband or wife and it is not possible as our ideas keep changing.

One has to remeber that one’s partner may have high expectations from the other.

These two do not meet.So one has to adapt.

And if one divorces with whom one is going to get married again?

You could not adjust in one relationship and what is the guarantee you can survive the other?

And in a married life strains are bound to happen.The trick is to face it and be done with it.

Do not carry forward the fight to the next.And respect other’s privacy.

It means the ability to share what needs to be shared and what need not.

Being open does not mean you bare it all.

Share to spouse what is likely to be of relevance to him/her.

However there are cases of infidelity,harassment.

In these cases one may go in for divorce.

Not for his or her movie choices are different,does not respect your relatives/friends.

To mend strained relationships and prevent divorce, please follow the mantra provided here.

Mantra in Hindi:    “ऊँ श्रीं ह्रीं पूर्ण गृहस्थ सुख सिद्धये ह्रीं श्रीं ऊँ नम:”Mantra in English: “Om Shreem Hreem Puran Grihsth Sukh Shidhye Hreem Shreem Om Namah”One may chant the first sloka of the Soundaryalahai’Sivah sakthyaayukthoo’ as well.

This mantra was revealed to Uma by Sage Durvasa to help Her marry Lord Shiva.

Mantra Yantra To Cure Impotency

I often receive emails on the issue of Impotency among both sex.

Sad part is that all are below 35 years.

I plan to write in detail on this issue on the reasons and how this can be solved by change in mental attitudes , Diet and change in lifestyle.

Lalitha Devi in Her Abode, Chintamani

Maha Tripura Sundari, in Chintamani Gruham

This will address the issue of those who are perfectly healthy .

However there are instances where there are problems relating to Sperm Count, inability of women, Fallopian tube issues and the like.

There are many Mantras to address this issue.

Here I shall detail the procedure for the Mantra from the Soundarya Lahari.

Adi Shankaracharya and Lord Ganesha(upto the 43 sloka) have hidden the fifty one aksharas of Devi in some slokas.

One such sloka is meant to cure Impotency and the issues I have mentioned above.

1.Have Devi, preferably, Lalitha Tripura Sunadri or Lalitha Devi Idol or photo.

Draw Rangoli on the ground with Rice flour .

Place a wooden plank wih legs on this and draw Rangoli on this also.

Have a Yantra prepared in Gold as found in the image below.


Devi yantra sloka 6. Soundaryalahari

The weight of Gold depends on your budget.




2.Adorn it with flowers, both the Yantra and the Idol/image.

Apply Sandalwood paste and Kumkum to the image or idol and the Yantra.

3. Have as many number of flowers as the number of times you plan to chant the sloka.

The sloka.

Dhanuh Paushpam Maurvi Madhukaramayi Panchavishikaah
Vasanthah Saamantho Malayamarudaayodhanarathaha!
Thathaapyekaha Sarvam Himagirisuthe Kaamapi Krupaam
Apaangaaththe Labdhvaa Jagadidamanango Vijayathe!”
धनुः पौष्पं मौर्वी मधुकरमयी पञ्च विशिखाः
वसन्तः सामन्तो मलयमरु-दायोधन-रथः ।
तथाप्येकः सर्वं हिमगिरिसुते कामपि कृपां
अपाङ्गात्ते लब्ध्वा जगदिद-मनङ्गो विजयते ॥

5. This should be performed by both husband and wife together(both chanting together)

6. Begin on a Shukla Shashti.

7. This has to be done early in the morning, preferably between 4. 30 and 6.

8.Perform this for 21 days.

9.Number of times the sloka to be chanted per day 500 ( five hundred).

10.Naivedya or offering to God daily after the chant is over andcAarthi performed.

Offerings: 21 Bits of sugarcane, milk gruel, betels and slices of areca nut with spices like clove, cardamom.

Other than sugarcane pieces other offerings minimum.

Partake offering , both husband and wife.

Diet. No Alcohol, non vegetarian food, onion or garlic.

Take milk and fruits in the night.

Do not disclose the mantra to others.

If periods ensue during this period, wife is not to chant the mantra for five days.




Overcoming Panic Attack Mantras

Recently I had a call from a youngster settled abroad that he had a series of Panic Attack and is undergoing psychiatric treatment.

Though he has been under treatment for about six months now he fears that he might get the Panic attack any time.

He was scared out of his wits and wanted me to suggest ways to tide over this.

I had suggested some mantras and after following them for four days he called in to say that he has recovered and he is no longer afraid.

Before I proceed on the Mantras let me touch upon what a panic attack is and the symptoms associated with it.

Panic settles in suddenly when one feels jittery, scared of every thing , expecting to die any moment.

This feeling is accompanied by palpitation, heavy sweating, eyes become unfocused and a feeling that he may lose his balance and fall down.

In general these attacks happen when one is alone.

This happens more to people who are away from home especially abroad.

Young people lured by western lifestyle and the money offered settle abroad and in most cases they are unmarried.

They have a vague understanding of the Lifestyle abroad and do not appreciate that your upbringing is rooted in your culture and sudden change in the lifestyle results in disorientation in value systems of which one is unaware.

Scooped in a foreign environment with no close relatives to interact Mind goes into depression.

One of the features of the Mind when alone is that it recalls and mulls over the unhappy moments of your past and it never dwells on happier moments one has gone through.

This leads to despondency and one tries to ward off this by watching movies engage in participating in Social media and physical exercise.

But these do not address the issue.

You seem to get relief for the period during which you are engaged in these activities.

Once these are over you revert to your depression and in extreme cases Panic attack.

The issue is to do with mental strength and resilience.

One must remember that being with people is a basic instinct called Gregariousness.

Brushing it aside will harm the psyche.

So be near to your family or be in communication with them regularly.

  1. Those who have settled abroad and are away from home, get married.
  2. Do not think constantly of your career and money.Life is more than money and carrer. It is about human relationships and warmth and life is a compromise. Compromising is not a sign of weakness. It is strength.  It helps you to adapt and survive. Happiness is strength and happiness is a state of mind.  It does not lie outside you. The secret to happiness is contentment.
  3. Never compare your self with the others.If you must you compare with the less fortunate And remember things could be worse
  4. Never have high ambitions. While we can identify ambitions we can never be honest about our capabilities. We normally set goals incompatible with our abilities.
  5. So do not plan long term goal for your Life. Life is not guaranteed for the next second.
  6. Do not plan for the instruments of happiness, like money, name and fame but for good health food and good sleep.
  7. Do not brood over the past.
  8. Do not set dead lines but do your best.

Now chant the following mantras, the first one 18 times a day and one of the mantras mentioned in my article  here.

Sarwas swaroope sarve sarva dukka nivarini

Bayepathrahine Devi Durge Devi Namosthuthe.

Procedure is explained in the article.


“Panic Attack.

Panic attacks involve sudden feelings of terror that strike without warning. These episodes can occur at any time, even during sleep. People experiencing a panic attack may believe they are having a heart attack or they are dying or going crazy. The fear and terror that a person experiences during a panic attack are not in proportion to the true situation and may be unrelated to what is happening around them.


  • “Racing” heart
  • Feeling weak, faint, or dizzy
  • Tingling or numbness in the hands and fingers
  • Sense of terror, or impending doom or death
  • Feeling sweaty or having chills
  • Chest pains
  • Breathing difficulties
  • Feeling a loss of control

Panic attacks are generally brief, lasting less than 10 minutes, although some of the symptoms may persist for a longer time. People who have had one panic attack are at greater risk for having subsequent panic attacks than those who have never experienced a panic attack. When the attacks occur repeatedly, and there is worry about having more episodes, a person is considered to have a condition known as panic disorder.

People with panic disorder may be extremely anxious and fearful, since they are unable to predict when the next episode will occur. Panic disorder is fairly common and affects about 6 million adults in the U.S. Women are twice as likely as men to develop the condition, and its symptoms usually begin in early adulthood

It is not clear what causes panic disorder. In many people who have the biological vulnerability to panic attacks, they may develop in association with major life changes (such as getting married, having a child, starting a first job, etc.) and major lifestyle stressors. There is also some evidence that suggests that the tendency to develop panic disorder may run in families. People who suffer from panic disorder are also more likely than others to suffer from depression, attempt suicide, or to abuse alcohol or drugs.

Fortunately, panic disorder is a treatable condition. Psychotherapy and medications have both been used, either singly or in combination, for successful treatment of panic disorder. If medication is necessary, your doctor may prescribe anti-anxiety medications, certain antidepressants or sometimes certain anti convulsant drugs that also have anti-anxiety properties, or a class of heart medications known as beta-blockers to help prevent or control the episodes in panic disorder.”

Citation and Reference


Image credit.



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