Seasons,months to marry,Which months to a avoid,Marriage Nakshatras,The attributes of a bride,The process of choosing a bride,The process of conducting marriage,
One can not choose his time of Death.
What does one need towards the end of his life?
In a highly personalised Religion, sometimes misconceptions creep in.
Though Hinduism insists that one has to study the Vedas, the Scripture of Hindus, people often do not do so, confused as they are with the dictum that Guru should be obeyed.
The problem is that Guru is different from Acharya, Upadhyaya.
For Details read my article Guru Acharya Upadhyaya.
Guru is one who instinctively understands your spiritual needs and guides and their instructions will never run contrary to Vedas, Sruthi.
In such cases where Gurus instructions are at variance with Vedas, Veda should be followed.
On the other hand, Upadhyayas and Acharyas do not have as nuch the authority as the Guru.
As such their instructions, if they run counter to Vedas are to be ignored.
Over a period of years people have not studied Vedas nor many know about the Smritis.
Smriti is a code of conduct which is followed over a period of Time.
Even Smritis if they run contrary to Vedas, are to ignored.
For Vaidikas, Vedas are the Sole Authority.
Many of us follow what purohit says without bothering to check either Sruthi or Smriti.
Result is that many irrelevant practices not found in Vedas , Smritis are followed.
I have been writing on some of these practices which do more harm to Hinduism than Atheists.
I have received the following query on Ashada Maasa, Adi in Tamil.
‘Dear Sir Good Morning. I have been reading your Blog since long time and the information u have been sharing is really incredible. Today, I have a question where I am not getting any exact answers ..hope u can clarify it for me.
This is Regarding the AAshada Masam as I got newly married, the customs followed during this month was implied on me as well but the questions unanswered or partially answered.
1. Why do Mother-In Law and Daughter inlaw should not walk in the same main door or stay together.
2. Why Husband and wife should not stay together.
3. Incase if the girl gets conceived during the aashada maasam will there be a negative effect on the child or is there any negetive effect on the mother during delivery time or so.’
All these points have no sanctions by Sruthi or Smriti and hence may be ignored.
These seem to have crept in as Mores/ practices in Communities.
There is also an effort to justify the separation of couples in Aashada, arguing that if the couple were to be together and if the woman conceives in Aashada, she would deliver in Summer .
This is effort to justify something which is not needed.
The premises for the practice is hypothetical.
And Hinduism does not intrude in to private affairs unnecessarily.
And wherever it needs to intervene in personal Life it comes out clearly with no ambiguities.
So one need not try to promote Hinduism by saying things which Hinduism does not.
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I receive quite a few mails regarding personal problems from the Readers ,seeking solution to their personal Issues and I suggest solutions both from the empirical point and from the Mantra aspect.Most report that their problems are resolved.
I have noticed that the issues fall under these issues. 1.Seeking a child. 2.Financial difficuties. 3.Court problems. 4.Health Issues,physical and mental. 5.Delayed Marriages. One important issue about which I have been receiving quite a lot of mails,to my regret, is marital incompatibility,strained relationships and divorce. I am pained. The Before I proceed to provide Mantra to help prevent break up of marriages,Improve strained relationships, I would like to share a few thoughts derived out of experience , interacting with a lot people and by counseling people.
Family is the fundamental unit of society and human beings,gregarious by Nature,need others for their well being,physical,mental,emotional and spirititual.
I have come across people who declare that they do not any one for anything .
Least of all a marriage.
I have quite a few friends who are women( connotation would differ if I say girl friends),who declared about 30 years ago that they did not like marriage,wanted to be independant and concentrate on their carrers.
I have met them recently and meet them often.
Some of them are well known in Fine Arts,Communications and all of them are successful professionals in their chosen field.
None of them is worth less than Rupees one crore and palatial homes in prime localities in Bangalore with servants galore to take care of them.
Being close friends ,they tell me that they feel that they have lost out in life,despite their material success and were anguished that they have none to call their own nor any one in whom they can confide in.
They admitted that professional success and a family need not be in conflict with each other and wished they had a family and pursued their ambitions and managed both.
It is too late for them now.
The point is when two individuals come together there is bound to be conflicts for if there is no conflict ,it is no relationship.
The skill lies in managing the two and survive.
Life is a question of adaptation,management and survival.
If you think deep,you will know that we have been compromising throughout our Life right from childhood.
And it is the Law of Life.
Had we not,we would not have survived.
There is a mistaken impression that we compromise for others.
We compromise because we want to be happy.
Nothing wrong in this.
One marries because one wants to and one feels one would be happy if one marries.
No body marries for altruism.
But as in life’s choices every thing comes with a unique problem of its own and one has to manage.
Are there not conflicts in Fine Arts ,in other professions?
Do people not adjust and manage?
Then why shy away from marriage?
In my opinion it is the fear of responsibility one has to bear with marriage.Marriage is not mere physical.
It has emotional and spiritual side as well.
One needs company after one crosses 50,not merely for Sex.
Unfortunately ,one tends to equate marriage with Sex,thanks to western thoughts!
In India marriages are beyond physical and they are spiritual too.Lord Shiva carries Uma as a part of His body,Vishnu in His heart and Brahma in His tongue.
Shiva and Parvati and regarded as words and meaning,one has no relevance withiut the other.
My point is that one has to adapt in marriages.
No one has an ideal husband or wife and it is not possible as our ideas keep changing.
One has to remeber that one’s partner may have high expectations from the other.
These two do not meet.So one has to adapt.
And if one divorces with whom one is going to get married again?
You could not adjust in one relationship and what is the guarantee you can survive the other?
And in a married life strains are bound to happen.The trick is to face it and be done with it.
Do not carry forward the fight to the next.And respect other’s privacy.
It means the ability to share what needs to be shared and what need not.
Being open does not mean you bare it all.
Share to spouse what is likely to be of relevance to him/her.
However there are cases of infidelity,harassment.
In these cases one may go in for divorce.
Not for his or her movie choices are different,does not respect your relatives/friends.
To mend strained relationships and prevent divorce, please follow the mantra provided here.Mantra in Hindi: “ऊँ श्रीं ह्रीं पूर्ण गृहस्थ सुख सिद्धये ह्रीं श्रीं ऊँ नम:”Mantra in English: “Om Shreem Hreem Puran Grihsth Sukh Shidhye Hreem Shreem Om Namah”One may chant the first sloka of the Soundaryalahai’Sivah sakthyaayukthoo’ as well.
This mantra was revealed to Uma by Sage Durvasa to help Her marry Lord Shiva.
I often receive emails on the issue of Impotency among both sex.
Sad part is that all are below 35 years.
I plan to write in detail on this issue on the reasons and how this can be solved by change in mental attitudes , Diet and change in lifestyle.
This will address the issue of those who are perfectly healthy .
However there are instances where there are problems relating to Sperm Count, inability of women, Fallopian tube issues and the like.
There are many Mantras to address this issue.
Here I shall detail the procedure for the Mantra from the Soundarya Lahari.
Adi Shankaracharya and Lord Ganesha(upto the 43 sloka) have hidden the fifty one aksharas of Devi in some slokas.
One such sloka is meant to cure Impotency and the issues I have mentioned above.
1.Have Devi, preferably, Lalitha Tripura Sunadri or Lalitha Devi Idol or photo.
Draw Rangoli on the ground with Rice flour .
Place a wooden plank wih legs on this and draw Rangoli on this also.
Have a Yantra prepared in Gold as found in the image below.
The weight of Gold depends on your budget.
2.Adorn it with flowers, both the Yantra and the Idol/image.
Apply Sandalwood paste and Kumkum to the image or idol and the Yantra.
3. Have as many number of flowers as the number of times you plan to chant the sloka.
वसन्तः सामन्तो मलयमरु-दायोधन-रथः ।
तथाप्येकः सर्वं हिमगिरिसुते कामपि कृपां
अपाङ्गात्ते लब्ध्वा जगदिद-मनङ्गो विजयते ॥
5. This should be performed by both husband and wife together(both chanting together)
6. Begin on a Shukla Shashti.
7. This has to be done early in the morning, preferably between 4. 30 and 6.
8.Perform this for 21 days.
9.Number of times the sloka to be chanted per day 500 ( five hundred).
10.Naivedya or offering to God daily after the chant is over andcAarthi performed.
Offerings: 21 Bits of sugarcane, milk gruel, betels and slices of areca nut with spices like clove, cardamom.
Other than sugarcane pieces other offerings minimum.
Partake offering , both husband and wife.
Diet. No Alcohol, non vegetarian food, onion or garlic.
Take milk and fruits in the night.
Do not disclose the mantra to others.
If periods ensue during this period, wife is not to chant the mantra for five days.
Feeling weak, faint, or dizzy
Tingling or numbness in the hands and fingers
Sense of terror, or impending doom or death
Feeling sweaty or having chills
Feeling a loss of control