Vedas do not advocate Temple Worship or Collective/Public Worship.
It does not mention Temples at all.
Yet Hinduism has many Gods and Temples.
For an explanation please read my post God has Name and Form, Yes and No, as entering this topic will take us away from the present post.
Every family, by custom, has a Family Deity குல தெய்வம்
Any auspicious function should be preceded by a Pooja first to this Deity.
It is mandatory to visit the Temple of the Deity, at least once a year.
Customs vary with regard to the Poojas being performed for the Deity.
Some times it happens(which should not), the children are not informed of the Family Deity by the Elders.
As a Result. the generation remains ignorant of the Family Deity.
In such cases, one can ask Family elders who are still alive.
If this attempt fails, check the names of your ancestors on your Father’s( for men only) side., for minimum three generations.
The family custom is to name the first child of the Family after the Family Deity.
If the Family Deity is a Female, and the eldest of the Family is a Male, check if a female name is given for a male , as in Kamakshi (and for Female the reverse).
And that will be your Family Deity.
The most common name will be your Family Deity.
Otherwise continue The present Deity( of which you are unsure) and if a Saivaite have Subramanya as an additional Family Deity and if a Vaishnavaite, have Lord Balaji of Tirupati.
If you are sincere in your quest you will get the name of the Deity from unexpected quarters..
Personal Deity-இஷ்ட தெய்வம்
Many have some special attachment to some Deity other than the Family Deity.
One can worship that as well.
But the first Pooja or priority should be for the Family Deity.
For instance our family Deity is Pazhani Dhandayudhapani.
My Personal Deity is Thirukkadiyur Abirami.
I follow both.
There is a small story about my personal Deity.
I have studied the Vedas under His Holiness Abhinava Vidyathhertha Swamigal of Sringeri Mutt.
He taught me the Pancha Suktas,( Purusha Sukta,Narayana Sukta, Vishnu Sukta,Sri Sukta and Durga Sukta) and Sri Rudram and Chamakam, among many other things.
I was enamored of Sri Rudram, am even now.
I used to recite quite often.
One day I visited my niece’s house( sister’s daughter, she is elder to me)
Her hsuband who was a close friend of mine was doing Pooja to Goddess Lalitha.
Despite learning from the Great man , I used to be playful, even now, on many aspects.
Instead of attending to Pooja, I asked my niece what she has cooked for the day.
She replied that she had prepared my favourite dishes but I must wait till the Naivedyam (Nivedan ) is over.
Her husband performed the Arati and as he came out, said’
‘ I am doing every thing for you and you are calling out my husband’s name”
I was confused.
I asked my niece,
She was also perplexed for she had never seen her husband talking like this.
No doubt he was a pious man , but not to the extent of being immersed in God.
He came out and I asked him what he meant.
He replied that he did not know what he said and asked me to confirm what I said “he said’
He paused for a moment and asked me whether I was doing the Sri Rudram recitation.
When I said yes he said to me.
” Fool(மடையா (Goddess Lalitha is saying that she is giving every thing to you and you are reciting Rudra, her Husband, You worship her”
I left it at that , ate a hearty meal and came Home.
Next morning, I chanced upon a copy of Abirami Andhadhi of Abhirama Bhattar.
( Curious thing is I never had a copy of it at home at all, This copy, I chanced upon in my office, where such books have no place-I was International Sales Manager of the organization)
As I read it, I felt moved and I took the copy.
Evening, I received a copy of Lalitha Sahasranamam form my friend as a compliment as he did not have much faith in the Mantras.
In the subsequent days I have received Soundarya Lahari, Shyama Dandakam, a flood,.all free of cost.
Then I immediately proceeded to Tirikkadayur to see Goddes Abirami.
I had never been to Tirukkadayur( actually it is Thitukkadavur).
On seeing the Idol of Abirami I felt happy beyond words and felt I was seeing The Mother of All.
From that day, She became my personal Deity .
Then on, when ever I feel like seeing her I will hop in any transport and proceed to Tirukkadavur, no planning
This happens quite often.
I go there for the Happiness I get on seeing Her and I never ask Her for anything.
Many call me Superstitious and a Fool.
If being Superstitious and a Fool brings me Happiness, I am more than happy to be one.
- Tirupati Laddus For Hair TTD, Shameful! (ramanan50.wordpress.com)