Balanced View Lifestyle World Death

We come across extremes in Life,

 

Life QuotesLife Quotes.

Pleasure, Pain,

Good,Bad,

Hot, Cold,

Love ,Hatred,

Home, World,

Family Life, Renunciation,

How does one follow the Precepts?

An advice is can not be followed unless it is  experienced or we experience something similar.

Another tack is to understand by observing simple things in Life.

Rain flows as a River rolling down everything in its wake, not respecting anything.

It is predetermined, even that it is not, nor are we sure about,

As the things do not know why they are tumbled when being tumbled, nor the River that impels them, one rolls down Life.

As such, one need not be overawed by Great-men, much less condescending towards the weak and less gifted.

‘

பெரியோரை வியத்தலும் இலமே;

சிறியோரை இகழ்தல் அதனினும் இலமே.”

We are solely responsible for our Life, be it Good Times  or Bad Times.

This accountability is the backbone of Hinduism and the Theory of Karma.

Of Course, we have limited Freedom, in that though we are free to choose a course of action, we can not determine the choices life offers or what impels us to choose a particular option.

None can insult you, demean you or elevate without your consent.

‘Atman is Your best friend and is Your worst enemy” Bhagavad Gita.

You are the Master of Your destiny.

‘தீதும், நன்றும், பிறர் தர வாரா;’

So are problems and solutions.

Hinduism is such a Religion that can say God is the Repository of Grief as well.

‘Dukkabukh,’ Repository of Grief-Vishnusahasranama.

Then why do we pray?

Because he gives you the strength, provides you with the tolls to tide over.

Dukka Sadanah’ Provides you with the avenues to combat the problems-Visnu Sahasranamam.

Therefore problems and solutions are with us.

“நோதலும், தணிதலும், அவற்றோர் அன்ன;”

This being happy or Sad is meaningless.

For even Death is not New!

“சாதலும் புதுவது அன்றே! வாழ்தல்”

So the whole world is Mine . All are my Friends.

‘யாதும் ஊரே,யாவரும் கேளிர்;’

‘Mara Ca Parvat Devi Pitha Devo Maheswarah,

Bhandavvah Siva Bhaktaasca,

Swadeso Bhuvath Thrayam’

Goddess Parvat is My Mother, Lord Siva is My Father,

Worshipers of Siva are my relatives,

Therefore the Whole World is Mine-Adi Sankaracharya.

யாதும் ஊரே ; யாவரும் கேளிர் ;

தீதும் நன்றும் பிறர்தர வாரா ;

நோதலும் தணிதலும் அவற்றோ ரன்ன ;

சாதலும் புதுவது அன்றே ; வாழ்தல்

இனிதுஎன மகிழ்ந்தன்றும் இலமே; முனிவின்,

இன்னா தென்றலும் இலமே; ‘மின்னொடு

வானம் தண்துளி தலைஇ, ஆனாது

கல்பொருது இரங்கும் மல்லற் பேர்யாற்று

நீர்வழிப் படூஉம் புணைபோல, ஆருயிர்

முறைவழிப் படூஉம்’ என்பது திறவோர்

காட்சியின் தெளிந்தனம் ஆகலின், மாட்சியின்

பெரியோரை வியத்தலும் இலமே;

சிறியோரை இகழ்தல் அதனினும் இலமே.

(பாடல்: 192
திணை: பொதுவியல் துறை -பொருண்மொழிக் காஞ்சி

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• Who Is Lord Siva, Nirvana Shatakam (ramanan50.wordpress.com)

Hindu Wedding Rituals Vratham Kankana Nandi Kasi Yatra Detail

Kankan Dharana

Please read my post on the components of the Hindu marriage.

Link provided towards the end of the post.

Kankana Dharanam.

On the wedding day,after Vigneswara Puja, Vratham is performed.

The wedding ceremonies start with the Vratham that is observed separately by the groom and the bride.

The Vratha is a ceremony where a vow is taken to go through the marriage and is performed by  the Bridegroom

The marriage ceremonies begin with the Vratham performed separately by the bride and the groom. For the bride, it means the tying of the KAPPU – the holy thread on her wrist which is meant to ward off all evil spirits. It symbolises a kind of the protective armour for the bride. For the groom, the various Gods – Indra, Soma, Chandra, Agni. From there on, the groom prepares himself for a new chapter in his life as a householder or Grihasta. The days of his bachelorhood or brahmacharya are now over and the acceptance of this is all what the Vratham is about.

In this ceremony, a cotton thread (applied with Turmeric powder) is tied to the wrist of the Bride and groom, indicating the vow to get married and declaring that they would not be deterred from the wedding ceremony and it is removed a couple of days after the wedding.

“the important ceremony called
kankana \ For this purpose they obtain two pieces of
saffron or turmeric, round which they tie a double thread.
They place on a metal dish two handfuls of rice, and on
this rice a cocoanut painted yellow, and on the cocoanut
the two pieces of saffron. Prayers are offered to all the
gods collectively, who are implored to come and place
themselves on this kankana, and to remain there till the
five days of the marriage ceremony have been accomplished.
The bridegroom then takes one of the pieces of saffron and
ties it on his wife’s left wrist, who in her turn ties the
other piece on his right wrist. The rice and cocoanut on
which the kankana has been lying are then given to the
purohita.

Then follows the procession of the tutelary deity. The
mother of the bride, accompanied by the other women
and the Brahmins who are present, go and fetch the copper
vase which represents the ishta-devata. The women begin
to sing and the musicians to play, and forming a procession
they march to the end of the street, where, after choosing
a clean spot, they pour out some of the water contained in
the vase. They do puja to the deity while it rests on the
ground, and then it is taken back with the same pomp to
the place whence it came. Then follows the most important

1 The ceremony is actually called kankana-dharana, that is, the tying
or wearing of the kankana.

Nandi.

This is performed to propitiate the Ancestors nd the Nadi Devatas.

After the completion of Ganesh Puja on the wedding day, several other Gods are worshipped. These Gods are known as Nandi Devatas.

Who are Nandi Devatas?

The Nandi Devatas are the holy Pitris, who live in the lokas of Bhuvash and Suvah. They are the builders of the subtle bodies, Sukshmadeha, around which physical atoms aggregate to produce the physical body. As the objects of marriage are the maintenance of the Grihastha Dharma and the begetting of progeny with spiritual, not carnal tendencies, the co-operation of the PitriDevatas is essential.

To propitiate the Nandi Devatas, a leaf-laden branch of the pipal tree is set up. Five Sumangalis (married women) would then wash the installed branch with milk. The ritual is followed by gifting clothes to the bride and the groom. Generally, the bride is presented a saree while a traditional dhoti is gifted to the groom as part of the auspiciousness.

Nandi Srardham

 

These PitriDevatas are not beings to be trifled with, and they are beings who generally avoid the physical plane of the Universe, the Bhurloka, and they should be sent away from the physical world as soon as the business for which they are invited is over. Nor are they to be invited frequently.

In an ideal Nandi Srardha, 12 Brahmins are invited, Dhotis and Angavastras are ditributed, their feet washed amidst the chsning of the Srardha Mantras.

Kasi Yatra.

In Hinduism a Man has Four Stations in Life,

Brahmacharya, the Ceibate,

The Grihastha, The Married,

The Vanaprastha, the detachment state, and

The Sanyasin, The Renounced State.

Boys aged 5 are anointed with Upanayana(read my post on this ceremony) and sent to a Guru for the Adhyayana or the repeated learning of the Vedas.

When they reach the age of 13 they are married.

Now the  marriageable age has changed.

When the boy comes of age for Marriage,after the Vratham, Kankana Dharanam and Nandi, the Boy goes to Kasi(Benares, Varanasi ,the Holy City of The Hindus, to meditate on the Brahman, The Reality.(Symbolically)

The bride’s father intervenes and requests the Bridegroom not to undertake the trip,become a Grihastha as Grihathaasrama is the fundamental Stage of Dharma or the Path of Righteousness, and offers his daughter in Marriage , promising that she will be his soul mate in performing the Vediac rituals that would guarantee spiritual enlightenment.

This is Kasi Yatra.

Kasi Yatra

Now comes the muhurta, that is to say, the most essential
ceremony of the marriage. To begin with, a sacrifice is
offered to Vigneshwara. The bride and bridegroom are
seated on the earthen dais, their faces towards the east,
and the married women proceed, singing the while, with
the young people’s toilette, which is of the most elegant
and sumptuous description. When attired the bridegroom
rises, performs the sam-kalpa, prays to the gods to pardon
all the sins he has committed since he received the triple
cord ; and, to be the more sure of this pardon, he recites
a mantram, and gives fifteen fanams to a Brahmin as alms.
He then dresses himself up as a pilgrim, and makes all
preparations as if he were really going to take a long
journey, announcing that he is going to start on a holy

222 THE KAXKAXA CEREMONY

pilgrimage to Kasi, that is Benares. He leaves the house
accompanied by the married women singing in chorus, and
by his parents and friends, and preceded by instruments of
music. After passing the outskirts of the village he turns
his steps to the east.

But here his future father-in-law meets him, and asks
him where he is going, and on learning the object of his
journey, begs him to give it up. He tells him that he has
a young virgin daughter, and that if he wishes it he will
give her to him in wedlock. The pilgrim accepts the pro-
posal with joy, and returns with his escort to the place
whence he set out. On his return the women perform the
ceremony of the aratti.

Source:

http://www.ebooksread.com/authors-eng/j-a-jean-antoine-dubois/hindu-manners-customs-and-ceremonies-obu/page-24-hindu-manners-customs-and-ceremonies-obu.shtml

http://www.sanathanadharma.com/wedding.htm

Related articles

http://ramanan50.wordpress.com/2012/07/17/an-introduction-to-samskarashindu-rites/

• South Indian Hindu Wedding Rituals Detailed List (ramanan50.wordpress.com)

Men Women For Sex When Alone

This is an observation by a Lower Court in India and The Higher Court has taken objection to it!

I am surprised.

Women and Men Symbol.

Is quoting a fact of Life condemnable?

I would have understood this stricture coming from a Feminist Group,come to think of it, from a Woman, as if a woman does a favor to Men by indulging in sex and that women are least interested in Sex.

Story:

A man and woman, if left alone, will always go for sexual intercourse.” This is what a Kancheepuram judge said while awarding life imprisonment to a murder accused last year. The judge‘s loose comments have drawn the ire of the Madras high court, which not only acquitted the accused but also decried the judge for arriving at “judicial conclusions purely based on surmises and conjunctures.”

In the March 13, 2012 order sentencing Kattu Raja, a factory watchman, for murdering a co-worker, the district and sessions judge-II of Kancheepuram had said: “A man and woman, if left alone, will always go for sexual intercourse. In this case, the accused and the deceased might have been left alone. At that time, the accused would have advanced sexual overtures towards the deceased. She might have refused. Still there might have been sexual intercourse between them. Again, the accused would have invited her for sexual intercourse, which she would have refused. This would have resulted in an ill-feeling.”

The order was quoted by the HC division bench of Justice K N Basha and Justice S Nagamuthu while acquitting Raja of all charges on April 30. Flaying the sessions judge for such loose comments, the bench said: “These observations of the trial court are based merely on conjectures. It is not understood as to how the court could come to a judicial conclusion that a man and woman, if left alone, will always go for sexual intercourse.”

http://articles.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/2013-05-14/chennai/39255063_1_trial-court-raja-confession

 

21 Century Women Changed,Yet The same

I read an interesting article in The   Telegraph ” How to be a Lady in the 21 Century‘.

It had a Professional teaching manners explaining the writer on the above subject.

Manners,

It conveyed the point that women of the day are not  being polite as they were before.

They swear too much.

They wear skimpy Dresses.

Women are bitchy at their work place.

Let’s see how women have changed in India in the last 20 years,in my experience.

The first thing that comes to my mind is that they call their Husbands by Name and use Singular in Public which was unthinkable.

I think some of the women of the Day are also uncomfortable, as my daughter confirmed.

This becomes an embarrassment when their small child addresses both byName and Singular!

I have seen them squirm.

Dressing the less they wear, the more ogling eyes, but it leaves the essential of Sex, Mystery!

As a wag remarked ‘a completely Nude woman is an ungainly sight!’

The absence of Coyness and courtship in Love.

I am not too sure how many women know the meaning of the term ‘coy”

The word is nearly dead.

Approaching girl, following her)not stalking) imaging one’s life with her was thrilling and a pleasure.

Now see, take out and ….?

Yet they remain the same.

Usual nagging, not allowing Husband’s relatives as freely as they would theirs,

Comparing  their Status with all and sundry including their sisters( brothers are not in this list) and  being jealous.

Possessive about their children and Husband.

Taking care of them.

Eternally dissatisfied with their Husband’s their Status.

Accumulation of junk at Home.

On Sexual behavior . I think that it remains the same as it was.

The only difference is that the News is spreads quicker and you have no place to hide!

Story:

“Being a lady today is about the same principles it always was – there are just different expectations,” Hanson explains with a smile. “It’s all about elegance and confidence and the behaviour doesn’t need to be something straight out of a Jane Austen novel.”

In a nutshell – being a lady to Hanson is about treating people with respect, having self respect (so not being drunk and disorderly) and having your own personality – but not being abrupt with people (as he so often thinks people are today). And all of these traits are to be taken into the workplace, instead of the home – which is where the majority of women spend the bulk of their time…..

he thinks that the demise of manners and society’s treatment of each other, has affected men and women equally. Hanson doesn’t long for the days when women were chained to the kitchen sink. He longs for everyone to remember the importance of social grace.

“Manners are all about putting other people at ease and thinking about others,” he says simply. “We have become increasingly selfish as a society.” And it is this vision I can buy into – as I find myself sitting up a little straighter as we talk…

What do women do today that they shouldn’t?

But seriously, what does Hanson think is specifically ‘unladylike’ about modern women’s behaviour today?

“I think women are swearing too much. I think they are drinking too much and I see them regularly falling into gutters on nights out. It’s fine to drink, but not to the point where you can’t control yourself,” he explains. And it is at this point I start to bristle a little.

“I also think women are sharing too much today. I was sat on the train the other day and a woman got on board and began talking very loudly about her private life on her phone. The whole carriage learned everything about her existence.”

He then also shares with me the rules around skirt length. Apparently a lady should never really wear any garment which is comes up higher than the knee. On the knee is fine and so is slightly above – but you must be wearing tights, preferably dark ones…

Hanson assures me the rules of engagement and society that he teaches cross to the place of work – but I am not too convinced on this on. I believe women in the workplace are all too often accused of being hard, or aggressive when trying to get across their points in difficult scenarios – an insult not directed at men – when making similar points in similar tones.

I am assured that the documentary host, Rachel Johnson, shares this concern. How can ‘one’ be a lady and a hard-ass at work – the two don’t seem to mix.

Hanson advises women to always keep their cool and keep their voices controlled in all scenarios. This will always reap the best outcome. But what about passion I counter? What about those moments when you need to row, both at home and in the workplace? Can you still be considered a ‘lady’ if and when you need to fight?

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-life/9952908/How-to-be-a-lady-in-the-21st-century.html

Some books may give you an idea.

Multicultural Manners ,Essential Etiquette for the 21 st Century by Roger Axtell.

21st Century Etiquette Guide by Charlotte Ford, Jacqueline DeMontravel.

One might get these Books at a good price, through flipkart,Amazon, Bestdeal,.

Follow the Link below.

http://www.cuponation.in/books-movies-music-coupons

 

Safety Cleanliness Freedom Women’s Day Survey. What?

Times of India , in collaboration with IMRB had conducted  Survey on Women on the occasion of the Women’s Day and had published the results with its comments.

This survey is reported to have been done in Six Cities of India.

Let’s assume the Survey is scientific ,which I doubt ,because of the sample size area and interpretation.

1.64% of Women feel Unsafe in the City.

2.60 % of Women step out side with company.

When one looks at the figures, it is evident one feels safe if they go out with company

.Only 4% are do not seem to subscribe to this view.

(One never knows whether both the responses are from the same person).

So if you feel safe with company why not opt for it  in the interest of your safety.

Complaint about Public Places.

45% say Toilets must be clean.

This applies to men as well.

Cleanliness is not Gender Specific unless if people are not clean.

Struggle For Independence.

Home Makers and Unemployed  29% want Independence.

Under sub clause in the same finding, 42% work for Financial Independence: 12% for Money

So it is all a question of being not committed for the family- “I would like to be independent of every one’-

Translate into common parlance ‘I am not sure of the relationship  and I want to be independent’

If the spouse also thinks the same way, then Marriage  and Family go out of the window.

Who takes the decision  on Big Investments?

39% say Husband.

Wait till you hear this data under the heading.

Who decides on Savings?

Woman decide.

40%

Who decides on method of  Contraception?

Women 21%

You decide on savings, contraception and yet say Husband decides on Big Investments.

It is like a man saying ‘I take all major decisions like obeying wife  while she does all unimportant things like finance; raising kids!

Either the Survey is skewed, or did not ask the relevant questions ….

Or Women being Women?

What is Women’s Day ,r Mother’s Day, father’s Day?

As if they no longer remain one on the other days!

Times of India and IMRB Survey Report.

Women’s Freedom.

Bangalore is safe, but not safe enough. At least, that seems to be what the majority of women living in the city believe, based on a study commissioned by The Times of India. The study, which is based on a survey of 900 women conducted by IMRB in six cities across the country, looked at various issues faced by women, beginning with safety, services available, gender issues at home and the workplace, health and financial issues. It shows that while women feel relatively safer in Bangalore compared to other cities, in absolute terms, opinions are divided. An overwhelming 64% of the city’s women said they do not feel safe in the city after sunset, and only 17% said they felt safe “at any time of the day.”

Some parts of the city are perceived to be less safe than others. TheMarathahalli Ring Road area, for instance, is perceived to be either “unsafe for women” or “very unsafe for women” by more than a third of those surveyed. “The stretch of Outer Ring Road between Marathahalli and Bellandur, where I live, is definitely underlit and possibly unsafe. The few times I’ve had to wait alone at Marathahalli junction for a bus or auto haven’t been pleasant,” says Ankita Sharma, who works in an HR firm in Brookefield and travels by public transport. Sharma says there are no street lights in this area and the operators of private vehicles soliciting passengers can get rude and hostile. “After the Delhi rape incident, I became especially wary of these private vehicles. I don’t know if any of them have proper licenses and whether the police keeps an eye on them,” she adds.

Other areas where women felt “unsafe” or “very unsafe” included Kengeri Road and the stretch between BEL Road and Vidyaranyapura. Even the morning stroll, so long a part of the Bangalorean’s day, seems to have become fraught. More than half the women (53%) IMRB spoke to felt unsafe during their morning walks. An increasing number of women feel so insecure that they have begun contemplating carrying a weapon – 42% of the respondents said that they “felt the need to carry a weapon/article of self-defence”

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/bangalore/What-women-in-Bangalore-want-Safety-cleanliness-and-freedom/articleshow/18857074.cms?

I can ad my comments on other statistics.

Can some one tell me what Freedom is being referred to here?