Posts Tagged ‘lifestyle’

Decisions Are They Rational Emotional

In lifestyle on September 9, 2014 at 18:05

With so much talk about Decision Making and specialists (?) who advise and conduct seminars , I though about this a bit.



An infant looks to its Mother for any support.


Infants just follow you right from stepping aside to walking, eating.


It decides to follow some of your mannerism(those with whom it spends most of its time).


Till some time.


One falls in Love.


And one does not like somebody.


One likes some things in Life, be it food or dress.


We take decisions , in these cases without knowing the reasons.


Most of the time in Life we react, are not proactive.


We become proactive when we are not personally involved.


When there are multiple choices available for a problem, most of the time, we are aware of only some alternatives, not all of them.


That is why the persons who speak about decision-making state carefully  one should take decisions with the available data.


The fact that the choice themselves are limited ensures that the decisions you  take are not totally free.


Please read my post ‘Choice’


There is this aspect of gut instinct.


Decision based on this normally does not disappoint you.


How and Why?


I have noticed decision-making in personal lives.


You like to buy a car, love a girl or Boy,want to go abroad.



In the last one,here is some deliberation.


In all others, you have already decided to your course of action.


But you want to justify it , to others as much as to yourself.


Reasoning, to me seems to be, an explanation not the Cause.


Lord Krishna explains this Gunathraya Vibhagayoga in Bhagavad Gita Chapter 14.


On hind sight I wish I could have taken them.

The cost?

I do not know.

But what forced me to choose one in place of another, may be circumstances, but still?

I had chosen what I thought I liked.

In retrospect, I find it could have been otherwise.

May be after couple of years  or even a days later I might find my present choice mentioned here are incorrect!”



We Express Better Than We Know Why

In lifestyle on September 9, 2014 at 13:56

Recently my close friend told me of some of his observations on what they speak about subjects, at time, in detail to the astonishment of others, including the Speaker.


He added further.


Kannadasan (Photo credit: Wikipedia)


“Couple if years back some one asked me a question on Hinduism, especially about Advaita.


You know that I do not know much about it.


But I spoke for about twenty minutes in detail and every one was surprised.


Funny thing is I was astonished myself.


Even to-day I do not know how I spoke.


Today I can not speak a ew lines about my self.


How and why?


Coming to the present, on some mornings (around 5am), when I do not get sleep , I get a lot of ideas which I am sure are quite novel and I am sure I do not know the subject nor have I read anything on the subject before.


Can you tell me why?”


He is not a very pious a man but has religious orientation like most of us.


I had given a serious thought about this.


I have seen these instances in many people including me.


Many times I have spoken on subjects in detail with authentic references  though I had not prepared on the subject.


I have also noticed , when I lecture on a subject, I normally prepare thoroughly.


But when I reach the Podium, i deviate from the prepared points(which I keep in mind, never in on paper as this distracts me), I speak fluently better than I had prepared.


Come to think of it, great compositions happen this way.


( I am not comparing myself with any of these)


Greatest lines in literature (in my view).


Age can not wither her, nor custom stale her infinite variety,


Other women cloy the appetites they feed,


She makes most hungry where she most satisfies’  Shakespeare in Antony and Cleopatra.


Or Kalidasa in Kumara Sambhavam.


Vagarthadaiva samprktau vagarthaa pratipattaye
Jagatah pitarau vande Parvati Parameshwehvarau

” In order to achieve the comprehension of word and meaning, I salute
the parents of the universe, Parvati AND Parameshwara, who are
inseperable like word and its meaning.


Or Abhirami Bhattar in Abhirami Andhadi.


அன்றே தடுத்து என்னை ஆண்டுகொண்டாய், கொண்டது அல்ல என்கை
நன்றே உனக்கு? இனி நான் என் செயினும் நடுக்கடலுள்
சென்றே விழினும், கரையேற்றுகை நின் திருவுளமோ.-
ஒன்றே, பல உருவே, அருவே, என் உமையவளே.


Gist of this is that, Abhirami,whatever I do and whatever might happen to me, even if I am stranded in the midst of Ocean, It is your job to save me”


This can be enjoyed only in the original.


Or some of the lines of Kannadasan in Tamil Films.


Kannukku Kulam Ethu,


Kangal Enge,


Ponal Pogattum Poda,


Mayakkama Kalakkama.


I  can go on adding to the list.


I shall post on the Poems I have enjoyed in Tamil and Sanskrit.


When I asked Poet Kannadasan  whether  he can produce some of the great lines he had penned again, he  replied No.


He said he wrote as the mood set in and he can not even remember how he got around to producing these lines .




Psychologists  try to explain these things in a lot of ways.


I had qualified in Psychology and the explanations and theories are labored and unconvincing.


To me it seems that certain things are expected to be expressed at a certain time by certain people.


And we happen to be the instruments.


My friend agrees.


Do you?

Image Credit.




Corporate Employee, Use and Throw.

In lifestyle on September 6, 2014 at 20:27

You start with five-figure salary, in some cases, six figures.


You are provided with free lunch vouchers.



You have subsidized canteen.


You get a cab to pick you up near your residence or in some cases from your residence.


You get Bonus, stock options.


You get free parties at company’s expense.


You get medical coverage, your Phone, Mobile Charges are reimbursed/subsidized.


You get ow interest housing advance.


You are provided with recreation facilities at your work place.


Even a Creche!


You stand to go abroad.


You can work from Home.




Your working timings are not fixed.


Your lifestyle is determined by others.


You are on call  24 hours  a Day 365 days a Year.


You report to too many people.


You are an assembly line worker.


You have targets which have no rationale, which are determined only by the Profit the Project earns for the Company.


In the guise of Motivational lectures, you are not consulted about what you can and what must be done.


You agree to every thing because of only Money.


Targets are to be met, period.


You are as good as your last deadline.


You are kept in ‘bench’, in simple English the Company has no use for you for the present.


Neither the company nor you have any idea about your future.


You are rewarded, of course, when you deliver,


When you fail….


Unceremoniously kicked out.


No human sentiments even if some is dying.


No personal bonding, despite lectures and HRs.


Are you a sugarcane to be used fully and thrown out?


Are you a use and throw material?


PS. the writer was in Senior Management Positions in MNCs, knows what he is talking about.


I am pained at the sufferings of the Youngsters.


Pity is that they are no even aware they are selling their freedom.


Rate of Divorces and Suicides are high in IT.


Simple answer touted, ‘Stress’


Stressed by what?


Think and LIVE.





Is This All There Is

In lifestyle on September 2, 2014 at 10:12

People, after a certain age, tend to change.


Especially those who have crossed 50, more so after 60.


They make it a regimen to go for a Walk religiously every day,start diet restrictions,try to withdraw to themselves and pretend that they are not interested in things which they think belong to Youth.


Life does not happen in compartments.

It is a flow in alignment with the individual’s dispositions.

Because one turns  over in age, does not mean he is to change his likes and dislikes.

You have not been able to do the things you wanted to earlier because of your career, Family commitments.

Now you are free to do what you like and enjoy doing.

And there is no pressure.


You have the mistaken impression that decisions taken by your children , in the family, means that you are sidelined,

You feel that you have to be consulted for everything,

You have the arrogance to think you are always right’

Your decision is final.

Remember how many times have  we felt, in the past,that these pressures of running the day-to-day affairs and wished others would share the burden, especially children.

And we train the children towards that end.

Then why this confusion?

Do what you like, without affecting the Family,maintain a detached attachment.

If you feel alright, no need to follow the myth imposed on the aged-be your age,do pooja regularly,go for a walk, restrict your diet….the recommendations are endless.

Do what you like and enjoy Life.

You have only one to Live.


Who Is Good Do We Know

In Hinduism, Parenting on August 28, 2014 at 19:35

I recently watched the popular talk show on StarVijay TV with participation from parents,teachers and students.


And what the teachers see as good and how do they identify the Good Student in general and a Good man in particular.


To my shock none of them have been able to specify a single attribute that characterizes a good Man.


The yard stick to determine One who is Good seems to be,


1.Good education with top rank.

2.Settling well in Life.

3,Respect to elders.


5.Good communication skills.

6.Well groomed.

7.Being open with parents in sharing their personal experiences including Love affairs.

8.Respecting parents.


None of them have been able to specify a single Human value, excepting one man who said ‘Love others’, that makes a Good man or woman.


Truthfulness, Honesty,Integrity,Righteousness, Concern for others,Helping others,flexibility in handling Life’s problems…


Where are we heading?


Is Life all about getting a Rank and settling (?) in Life with self-centered existence?


Is the anchor rightly pointed out, all the people in the show indicated what they do not want to see in  Man or woman, implying that they have a Clear concept of what is bad and none at all about what is Good!


When you do not know what Good is how do you set standards for your children?


I recall the statement by Henri Bosanquet on the question of defining what Good is,


‘Just as you can not explain what the color of yellow is to one who is born Color Blind, you can not explain what Good is to one who has never done anything Good in Life”


I consider this as the best definition.


And what defines Bad?

‘Doing things in Public which you would be ashamed of doing it in Private”


Well we from the land of Bharat are not short of Dharma Sastras or Moral literature.


Let us look a simple one from Tamil, Athichoodi by Avvaiyar.


தமிழ் எழுத்து தமிழ் வாக்கியம் English Translation
அறம் செய விரும்பு Intend to do right deeds
ஆறுவது சினம் Anger will be cooled off,Cool your Anger
இயல்வது கரவேல் Give to others what you can
ஈவது விலக்கேல் Do not stop, discourage others when they attempt to help others
உடையது விளம்பேல் Never be boastful of your possession
ஊக்கமது கைவிடேல் Never loose enthusiasm
எண் எழுத்து இகழேல் Learn the Three R’s
ஏற்பது இகழ்ச்சி Never accept Alms
ஐயமிட்டு உண் Feed others before you eat
ஒப்புர வொழுகு Move with world, act in harmony with the others.
ஓதுவது ஒழியேல் Never give up learning
ஒள ஒளவியம் பேசேல் Never gossip
அஃகஞ் சுருக்கேல் Never short change in Business

The fine point is that the first letter of all these Truisms  start with the Tamil Alphabets in order.

There is more.


One may learn this and pass on to children instead of Jack and Jill, Baba Black Sheep, Rain rain go Away in country where the Climate is Hot and there is dearth of rains.

Hope elders learn this first.



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